28 Nov 09 What are your views on common law marriage vs Legal marriage?
Tags: Common Law Marriage, Feedback, Legal Marriage, Marriage, Professional Development, Star Gate, Thanks In Advance
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Tags: Common Law Marriage, Feedback, Legal Marriage, Marriage, Professional Development, Star Gate, Thanks In Advance
common law last longer legal are shorter
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I personally would not agree with “shacking up”, but to each his own. I would choose legal marriage. No only is a moral issue for me, but you have more legal rights.
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didn’t know any states still recognized common law… ummmm, i would say legal means exactly that, a piece of paper, and thus if a divorce insues, well, lots more expenses as well too. not sure on the other really, my state no longer recognizes it, if it ever did.
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I feel as a woman that marriage gives more legal protection if you are married. My husband died very early in life and I had an easier time getting benefits. This might have been more difficult if we were not married. If you love someone why not do it right?
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I think legal marriage is far more prevalent than common-law marriage – if for no other reason than that the majority of US states don’t recognize common-law marriage. I personally would certainly choose to get married legally; I mean, if I’m in a committed relationship anyway, why not get all the perks and benefits – and if I’m not quite ready to be “married”, I would rather just stay single, cuz I like it just as much.
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Of course I believe in legal marriage, I have been married 33 yrs. Personally I believe this because I think its too easy to walk out for whatever reason/excuse.
Marriage is a commitment for life before God and your family and friends. He is the glue that holds life together.
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I think that most people chose common law. It is getting to be that common law is the same as a legal marriage but with paying for the wedding and for the divorce. Most people can just walk away from a common law were as a legal marriage you can’t. Then there are those that have been together for so long that they figure why bother. I am legally married and that is the way I wanted it. I didn’t get married to get a divorce and I made sure that he was the man that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I also knew that he was the man that I wanted to go threw good and bad with. I wanted everyone and the law to know that I was his wife and he was husband.
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Common law marriage is “man’s law”. It is not something that God approves of but unfortunately the world has led many to believe its just as good. The question is, do “you” want to live according to God’s Word or not? In the sense that two people are living “as husband and wife” and enjoying the same benefits, its something of like (this is crass) giving God the bird. He created marriage and “you” are saying “Im not going to seek Your approval or blessing on it.” Marriage is the most divine covenant God created…how arrogant is it of man to find loop holes around it?
God bless you and keep you….
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This is one of those questions that is a “to each their own” kind of thing. I personally do not believe that common law marriage should exist. My state of SC just banned the law, so it no longer matters if you live together 20 years if you haven’t done it legally. I guess my thoughts on it is this…….I feel as though two people who share a home, maybe children, finances, and basically life in general should get married the legal way and do it before God. I mean, why share all those things with someone and when things get a little tough just because we aren’t legally married, they up and walk off from you, because we all know that marriage is sometimes trying. Marriage is an institution and I feel as though it should be sacred
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I think if you are stupid enough to stay with someone long enough for it to be considered a ‘common law’ marriage (which really has no meaning whatsoever anyway) without a real committment you deserve whatever you get and don’t really have any right to expect anything. I think the choice to be in a common law marriage should mean exactly NOT getting tangled up in each others stuff too much and basically if one or the other decides to leave then at that point its just done. If you get your finances all tangled up with someone you aren’t married to then you are what is commonly known as a fool! My bf was with a girl for 15 years (with a couple of starts and stops) and made this mistake, his credit is completely ruined, she got 8 credit cards in his name and opened a ‘joint’ account with the help of a friend at the bank. He’s pretty much screwed and so far I’ve been trying to clear it up for 2.5 years and I’ve had some success but its been very difficult and very aggravating and we had to press charges against her, it was the only way…he’s still nowhere and won’t be for a very long time.
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I liked Seti’s anwer… Is she single?
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Considering that only 15 states and the District of Columbia even RECOGNIZE “common law” marriages, and that there is still the widespread misconception that “if you live together for X number of years, *poof* you’re married”, I would take the information that you get on this site with a grain of salt.
for facts about what constitutes a common law marriage, where they are legal, what the test is for a common law marriage, etc.
Since it’s only recognized in a handful of states, and there are specific requirements to qualify as a marriage, logic would dictate that “formal marriages” outnumber “common law marriages” by a wide margin.
I think it’s useful and it has a place – we filed a “declaration of informal marriage” when we bought the house so I would be recognized as the legal spouse for insurance purposes, but we’re still having a formal marriage later this year.
For questions of legality, inheritance, protection of children, etc., it can be a useful alternative to going through the formality of a marriage. However, with the easy availability of legal marriages in the US these days, I think the usefulness of the ORIGINAL purpose has fallen by the wayside.
To dispell some of the misconceptions that have already been posted in this thread……
In fifteen states and the District of Columbia (see below), though, common law marriages are recognized. If a man and a woman (same-sex marriages aren’t recognized) live together and “intend to be married” by acting like they are married, telling people they are married, and doing the things married people do (using words like “husband” and “wife,” filing joint tax returns, etc.), they become common law spouses. This gives them the same rights and responsibilities as people who got married the old-fashioned way, with a trip to City Hall and a wedding.
Common law marriage isn’t something to do lightly. If you become married by common law and later decide you want to end your relationship, you still have to have a standard, legal divorce. In this way, common law marriages are very similar to regular marriages: they’re usually easier to get into than to get out of.
There’s no simple test to see if a couple qualifies as being common law married, and the only time the question usually arises is in court. If, after death or separation, one partner claims there was a common law marriage and wants the benefits of marriage, the court would consider many factors to determine if there was truly intent to be married. Since the seven – years – to – automatic – marriage idea is only a myth, determining whether a common law marriage existed can be complicated. Some lawyers recommend that couples write, sign, and date a simple statement that says they do or do not intend to be married, to offer protection should the question ever arise.
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While it doesn’t really speak to your question, something I encounter frequently and don’t understand. I am a Mother-Infant nurse. I constantly encounter unmarried couples having their first, second, and even more child together.
Our policy is that the name tag on the baby’s crib have mom’s last name on it. (to cut down on mix-ups that might occur if baby “Smith” belonged to mom “West” and baby “Green” belonged to mom “Smith.”)
We frequently have dads get irate that “that’s MY baby and I want MY name on the crib tag.” If they were legally married his last name would most likely BE on the crib tag and the name bracelet.
Why do they have to get all macho about last name of the baby when they don’t care about the last name of the girlfriend/mom?
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From what I can see, common law marraiges are rarely planed to end up as marriage, but simply fallen into out of lack of attention to details. Meaning, they don’t realize they are married until after the fact sometimes.
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Common law marriages are what Trailer park folks have…
Legal Marriage is what normal people have.
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